When will I Meet Him?

If you’ve been single for a while or not with the right person, I’m sure you will agree, no matter how great life is, there’s going to be a moment you will ask the universe, “when?” You may even ask yourself “how?”  Especially if you are not living among the online dating world. 

Over the past three or four months, I’ve turned down countless dates, for a few reasons. 1) Being the busiest I’ve ever been in my entire life, between my demanding professional life and travel schedule, and releasing my first book 2) I am actually happy, and full, and enjoying the precious few moments I have with friends and family or myself. 3) The timing hasn’t worked out, or I’m just not interested in those who are asking.

After three consecutive weeks of travel, and maybe 72 hours at home combined, I chose to spend my available night out with girlfriends. First stop, dinner! We met at one of our favourite downtown spots, Drake One Fifty. The restaurant was packed! Much to the delight of 5 single women, full of very good looking men. I excused myself to step away when a man grabbed me by the arm, twirled me around and pulled me close to him. 

He was sitting with a table full of friends, most of whom were married. He started about how he’d had his eye on my friend until I stood up and turned around. I laughed. He asked if I was married. I almost choked laughing. I couldn’t be more single, and somehow told him I was just enjoying my single life for the moment. He offered to double my enjoyment to consider not being single. My instinctive reaction was to laugh harder and shake my head. He then asked how I could be satisfied if I wouldn’t give him a chance. I was so thrown off, I thanked him, stood up and escaped to the ladies room. 

My friends got a kick out of the whole scene curious to know what the hell just happened. Thankfully our tequila shots arrived at the table and the night carried on. We left and continued our fun at Fonda Lola, another favourite spot in the city, especially for a group of newly budding tequila connoisseurs. Our favourite Tequila Expert and collector, Andres, was in fine form to give us a tequila tasting and lesson in appreciation. I must say between the comment from the man at the restaurant and listening to Andres’ passion and beautiful tongue, my body was fully present, my mind slipped a million miles away.

I awoke to a killer crossfit workout this morning. As much as it hurt with a few shots of tequila and limited sleep, it felt so good to clear my head. I hit the steam room in my condo after. Alone, in the quiet. The steam filled the room, I was alone. I closed my eyes and sank into the quiet heat. For a moment, I recalled the comment the evening before, then the way I felt listening to Andres… and I began to wonder. When? How? Who?  It was a quiet day alone today, which gave me the chance to check back in. Fortunately, I have the hope and faith that it’s coming, and that I am right where I need to be at the moment. I will not lie, I miss the men I once loved, not likely for who they are now, but for who I wished they would be, for the feeling that I have for them. I miss love. There was a day that meant I'd go out and find someone, anyone. Today, I know the wait will be worth it :) and I refuse to settle again.

On a day like this, I know it means I simply need to give out more love to the world. 

“Life is very simple. What I give out comes back to me. Today I choose to give love. Love is all there is!” ~ Louise Hay