Catch up!! The Perfect Date?

Theoretical lessons aside, I feel it is time to bring you up to speed with what's happened in my dating adventures...

CHRIS, who made it clear that the benefits part of friendship was the priority, is no longer in contact. initially out of my own confused state and not willing or ready to let the situation go, I tried to hang in for the abuse. When I started to listen to my gut and the stress of the situation, I realized I was paddling my boat upstream like many of us do. The words of a wise person I once heard pointed out that "nothing you could ever want is upstream". So if you find yourself in a situation that is causing you more discomfort and stress then happiness, turn your boat around.  And so I did. I made it clear to Chris that his proposition was of no interest to me. My deepest fear came true. He was furious. Now I realize, why was I so afraid of that?  None of the situation lines up with who I am and what I believe, therefore, it simply throws me off centre. The situation has resolved. This person is no longer in my life, and today I realize that is more than ok. His part in my story is over. :) Today I am grateful for the lessons learned and the return to flowing with the current, downstream.

AARON, whom I have been dating casually for a little over 2 months, the one that was just so different and nice. Well, different and nice aren't enough. And I came to realize that keeping this relationship in my life may simply be preventing me from being open to whatever else is ahead in my journey. Although I have not formally closed this relationship. I have mentally and emotionally ended this, and will allow the situation to resolve or find the opportunity to let him go. 

JASON - well, he has moved back to my home town. My last communication with him I shared that I was surprised and not certain how I felt about the situation. For the past year, I have been reassuring to him about my feelings. This time, without fear, I simply pointed out that "circumstances are different now". And, the very thing I had feared did happen. He never responded. And I realize, why was I so afraid of that? This relationship brought me a lot of emotional pain and stress, negative thoughts and energy. He is here with a child, and a relationship with someone else. I am at peace, I wish him well, and I knew it was time to let it go.  I continue to believe that the universe has it's own plan for me, and if this person or any other person is meant to be in my life, I won't really have a say, it will just happen.  And so... I have let this go.

Enter KEVIN... alright, so you already know how I felt about online dating. I'm a huge skeptic. A girlfriend helped me change my perspective, and I think I finally have a bit of a new take on it... so I ventured on to a different paid site. And met Kevin. Initially when he asked for my number after a handful of exchanges I hesitated. Then figured, that was silly to be on the site and engaged in email exchanges and not open to the next step. We exchanged numbers and began IMing. We seemed to have a lot in common in all of our exchanges. He convinced me to come to dinner that evening. He called and we communicated for over an hour. The conversation was natural and entertaining.   I met him for dinner, he was for once a seemingly true representation of his online profile. We laughed about how misleading that can be. The conversation continued to flow... he showed the old chivalry behaviours that I can honestly say I haven't experienced for a long time if ever. Opening doors, car doors, and walking on the outside of the sidewalk, paying for dinner, holding my hand.  This was the perfect date, and truly unexpected. So what does it mean... who knows? For today, the only thing I can take from it was that this is the way I want and deserve to be treated.  Whether it goes anywhere or not, time will tell... For once, I'm open, but not going to invest.  Perhaps it's my new centre, perhaps it's because I have truly in my heart decided I'm just fine on my own and no longer actively pursuing a relationship... this was the first date I let the real me out. I was my silly, quirky, passionate self. And I truly enjoyed the experience of it.

Looking forward to the next chapter in my journey!